Just when you think you got yourself sorted and this thing we call life you get thrown back 10 steps, not one or two, fucking ten!
I’ve got this rational side of thinking and this completely irrational side, can I control it? Absolutely not lol
Would I like to? Definitely.
One minute I can be super positive about where I’m heading in life for myself and my family and the next I’ve got no fucking idea what’s going on or where I’ll be in a day or two let alone in a year or two.
Sometimes I feel so stuck in place and stuck in my head that I’ll be right where I am forever but on the other hand I know things are constantly changing and it can always get better.
Sometimes the worst place you can be is in your own head. It can be a messy place up there!
It can change but fuck me it takes some work.
Sometimes I think yep I’ve got this and other times I feel like it’s swallowing me whole.
Lately I feel like I’m just floating around, like I’m just here waiting for the next panic to drop and pushing through each day hoping it gets better but it just doesn’t.
I’m just so mentally exhausted that I don’t really know what the go is, I don’t know how to fix it or what I should be doing. I’m just… I dunno, hanging around hoping for the best I guess 🤷🏼♀️
I’m just so fucking tired with it all